Back on the job market

Late last year I was offered a position with a recruitment firm. I didn’t take it for the same reason I never applied for such a position when I was in London. They suck you in with a salary of at least xxx but when they offer you the job, they tell you that actually they are only going to give you a pittance and the rest is made on commission.

This job was offered to me because I used them to find a job. I will not tell you which one it is, because they have made me sign all amounts of confidentially clauses, and well it is likely that I may be sacked if anyone reads to the end of the post.

So as I said, initially I declined, and well I thank God I did as I would not have been able to have taken the break I did. But I got back, and the opportunity was offered to me again. It was becoming apparent that these clowns were not going to look for a salary paying job for me, as they wanted me to work for them. So I have taken it. Why not, I get out of the house, I get to meet people, and the more people I find jobs, the more money I get right. Well not exactly…

I have been put on a fixed term contract for a year, which I don’t mind, I have had a few interviews since I got back and not even sure I will even do 6 weeks here (hopefully). But the problem with this is that 6 months out of this year, I am put on probation, and within that period, I am not titled to any commission. If I were to find a job through the company, the other company would have to pay these people 36 months gross salary as a penalty, so that puts my networking theory down the tube. Salary is a month in lieu, so I don’t get my first pay cheque until the end of March so basically, I am working for free from now until June should I chose to make this a career and for the next 6 months I might as well forget about eating, watching dstv, and servicing my car.

Now don’t get me wrong, I admire recruitment people, sorry, Headhunters(well actually not really, I haven’t found a job through one to this date, but hey maybe my CV doesn’t scream that I could make them any money so I haven’t had a call back). But this is basically high class telesales. I have a script for candidates and a script for clients and I am supposed to make 40 calls every day and use this long arse essay as a script for prospecting clients. It makes no provisions for the inevitable “why the *** are you agency people calling me, get off my line”. There is also a lot of information that you are supposed to give out in this one phone call. On Monday, I sat through role play, and didn’t win many fans when I suggested that they should condense down the script because they just lost me. Ok so I have the attention span of a gnat these days but even the most attentive person would be lost. I was told that the client must have all this information, I’m thinking, just give him the bullet notes and then send an email with the full proposal but no, you have to spend 30 minutes just talking. Which goes onto my second point, I do like talking a lot, but 9 times out of 10 it is over a G&T with friends. I don’t want to be talking plenty (as my people would term). Ask me to draft an email, analyze some figures, do a powerpoint presentation. But call people, and give them a sell that I am not even convinced of, and I get all tongue tied.

Second thing about this place is, it is a beautiful office, the people are wonderful don’t get me wrong, but it is not organized. For anyone who has used this place and failed to be placed, put it this way, I have CVs which are 5 years old sitting on my desk and nobody has called. Now some of these CV’s should be put in the bin, but some are really good, and these are not your little just out of school Graduates. These are Senior Managers, Managing Directors, people who should have been put in decent positions years ago. I actually came across my cousins CV, he worked at Guinness for years and then moved to Viasat1. There was a brief period where he was unemployed but now he’s recently branched out on his own. Today, years after he was looking for a job, I am supposed to call him and asked if he wants a job. Really? But they claim to be of International standard, it’s basically an all fur and no knickers establishment. But as I said, it gets me out of the house, and the people are really lovely. On the plus side, I get to pretty myself up and get myself noticed. Even if I am not allowed to solicit for a job for myself, I can help others, and there is nothing in the contract which says I can’t date the clients…haha

On the plus side, things are really looking up. It is like my CV has popped out of the back of every draw of every office I applied for. I have been called for quite a few interviews, and one position is looking like it may be fruitful, but second interview is coming up in a couple of weeks so it is likely that I will be here for a month. My CV is also being forwarded to another person at the bank. So in the meantime, I am delaying the signing of the contract and hoping that the fact that these interviews took place before or not through the agency means that I shouldn’t get into any trouble. I think I will have to talk to the MD before I sign anything.

Yes, I will do my best to put as many people in jobs for the time here, but my top priority candidate is ME!

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About efiasworld

The black Bridget Jones and an English woman in Ghana
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